Most mums blogging about their 2 month old baby would probably just spend it gushing about how amazing their baby is and how great things are going and believe me, we will get to that bit.... but what a lot of mums (and dads) tend to gloss over are the in-between bits. The honest, warts & all parts that almost parent goes through but no one talks about.
Well.... I am gonna talk about it.
See, you should never be fooled by what you see on someone's social media. People usually only make a point of sharing the good parts of their life. I share tons of pictures of you because there are a lot of good bits. But the whole truth is that you aren't always sweetness & like.
What people don't see are pictures of you being a handful when you spend an entire evening crying. Totally unsettled unless me or daddy are holding you. And not just holding you. But rocking you. Standing up. It has to be standing up. If any of those three elements are missing you wake up screaming & we're back to square one - it's not often me & daddy eat a meal together or get to see a program all the way through.
What I don't post are "cute" pics when it's 2am and you keep me awake for the rest of the night. And not because you are hungry. Just because you want to fuss & be cuddled. And you won't go back in your moses basket. And you refuse to let me in my sleepy state try & palm you off with a dummy. And the only way to get any peace is to bring you into bed with me. But then I'm so afraid of squishing or suffocating you that I spend the rest of the night not sleeping next to you.
But d'you know what? All this is ok. It's normal! You're a baby.
These parts conveniently get forgotten later down the line. I'm sure that your brother was a giant pain in the butt at times too! Time passes & memories fade. It's absolutely true when people say that parenting is the hardest but most rewarding job in the world.... because all that aside, you bring us a lot of joy too & the happy parts that I post to social media are all totally true!
Your appearance has changed so much over the past two months. I get such a strong feeling of deja vu when I look at you. Not just because you we are so used to seeing you now, but because so many times when I look at you I see so much of Dexter. I love how alike you both look. It melts me.
I remember looking at your bald little eyelids in those earlier days but now your eyelashes have really grown in and they are so beautiful.
You hair continues to get lighter. It is so short & fair on top, it really looks like you are bald (haha) but actually when you see it in the light there is quite a lot - it is just so soft & fair that it's hard to see. Round the back however, it is still so dark & long you could virtually tie it in a pony tail :D
You were 4 weeks & 4 days old when you first smiled responsively. It's great after weeks of nothing to finally start getting a reaction to the faces I pull & the silly voices I make. Only now, you also have an adorable little laugh to go with it. It's like a little inhale of breath with sound. So cute!
Despite my terrible vocals, you seem to really like my singing. Sometimes you lay on my lap smiling as I sing silly songs to you, other times feeling the vibrations as I cradle you against my chest sends you to sleep. I can bop round the kitchen with you in one hand, doing washing up with the other & wailing along to Peanut Butter Jelly Time and you will be asleep in seconds! haha
And even though you are still waking at night, it's not to feed. You don't need to wake up. You just want cuddles & reassurance. As it happens, you have your last feed at 10pm and don't feed again until 6-6.30am! That's pretty awesome. You'll grow out of the night waking before too long. And in the meantime it's actually pretty sweet to lay next to you in bed giving you gentle kisses on your forehead & smelling your fluffy hair as your breathe deeply in your sleep.
When we went for your 6-week check you were diagnosed with reflux. You were uncomfortable when feeding, regurgitating what you drank & evidently not gaining weight (you had only gained 3oz in two weeks making you 9lb 10oz) and so it was making you miserable. After being prescribed infant Gaviscon, it seemed to make such a massive difference. You were so much more content & settled during the day in comparison.
When we took you back earlier this week to be weighed again, you are now a healthy 10lb 12oz. This puts you on the 25th centile for weight but at 60cm long you are on the 98th centile for height!!! Making you slim but super tall. You currently wear:
- up to 1 month in tops
- 0-3 month in bottoms (that are long enough in the leg but usually too baggy round the waist)
- and those long legs are almost ready for 3-6 month sleepsuits!
So you see, it's ok that you have your flaws. It's what makes you, you! And without the hard parts, we wouldn't have the rest of it where you are smiling at me from behind your bottle when I'm tired first thing on a morning or gurgling in response to me chatting to you over the worktop as you watch me making tea or watching you sleep so peacefully. We wouldn't be able to laugh at the dainty little princess who looks like butter wouldn't melt but churns out some whopping post-feed burps or lays in her bouncer casually farting like a trooper.
We love you baby girl, warts & all.... xx
